Tuesday, November 9, 2010

" I THINK WE NEED A BIGGER BOAT "




Wow!!! It's been a minute since I posted something on here. Whats bad is I tell myself "You need to write on your Blog" all the time, but I just never set down and do it. Go figure. As if that's not an age old illness.

Well there has defiantly been a lot going on since the last time I posted, but I'm going to try not to bother with listing every single detail that has happened since then.

I have had a lot on my mind the last couple of weeks, but I'm really not sure where to start or even if I should put it all out there. It's funny how people are so different from one another. Some people can just talk talk talk while for others it's like you have to drag things out of them, or how some people can always seem to be the life of the party so to speak, while other people have to make them self's even go to the party. Please don't take me wrong while I'm writing this I'm not looking for someone to feel sorry for me nor am I in some place of depression. But I wonder if it is something that I can change. Anyone that reads this that knows much about me at all knows that I am in the group of the non-talking party-less people. :) This is something that I really struggle with. It aggravates me often. I try to tell myself to fix the problem, but I'm not sure how to to do it. I am the the type of person that does not even like carrying the gift into the Birthday Party. Because I do not want to draw attention to myself. I am the person that has trouble going up to people to just talk. Sure I can go up and tell them something but when that is through I go blank. I am the type of person that wants to draw the very least amount of attention to myself as possible. Its like sometimes I feel like I am not good enough or that people will think less of me... Why is this??? What is the problem??? Why do I automatically think people will look down on me??? what makes me feel like I'm less then anyone else??? I may never find out, but I really want to. I feel like this is a hindrance to me as a person and me as a minister. I want to reach as many people as I can for the Kingdom of God, But yet I have to often time literally force myself to talk to people. Not because I don't want to talk to people, but because it is something that almost terrifies me. Now when i say i have to force myself to talk to people I don't mean family and close friends, but beyond that it is a steady fight. Again please don't misunderstand me. I DO witness to people and try get them to church and so on, but I wish I could be one of the people that it comes natural to. well enough about that!!! Pray for me as I figure out how to conquer this problem.

On a lighter note since I never got to what really been on my mind the last couple of weeks.... I have taking up Golf . I am pretty horrible at it but love it. Golf is something I have found to be relaxing and exciting all at the same time. Greg Cutrer said it best when he told me you may hit 50 bad shots and then 1 good one and then hit fifty more bad one but you keep coming back because you liked the way that one good one felt. (that's not word for word but you get the jest)

well that all for now i bid the farewell..... Sing it with me Farewell adieu to you fare Spanish ladies, farewell adieu to you ladies of Spain; for we've received orders for to sail back to Boston, but we hope in a short time to see you again.....

By the way Uncle AL it's time to come back to Paris For Some Golf!!!!